I don’t know how much more of this I can take. To be honest, I’ve been on my last limb for ages now. My heart’s been breaking further and further, constantly being given hope time and time again only to be brought back down. I already slipped up once, I don’t wanna slip up again.. I feel isolated, alone.. Just buried in nothing. I’m a shadow, only darkened by the brighter light I see. Only seen when people want to see me. Made out to be something scary or beautiful. It’s not something I mind, I’d rather be a shadow than step into the light to be honest.. But to be frank… Even a shadow needs some attention at some point. Not to get attention, but to get help. To be helped instead of always just silently helping and pushing forth effort into other’s lives to help. How can I keep helping if I can’t even get out of bed anymore? I just.. I want to be able to keep helping people, but every time I talk to someone, I have to struggle to keep my attention on them because I feel like I’m dying constantly. Always getting my hopes up only for me to realize, that without a job and car, I can’t make anything happen…. Stop breaking my heart every time I talk to you.. Just.. Stop. Please?